I texted Mum two weeks ago to ask if she’d like to go to Salzburg with me. I expected a negative response but to my surprise I got a “yes”. I went about plans researching and running around like a headless chicken trying to organise myself. I went to Deutsche Bahn to ask for my ticket. [...]

It’s not often that you can look back on a childhood crush with a measure of pride. As a rule, whether you were shrieking the name of the gay one from Boyzone or failing to realise that, at the age of seven, you were one of the only women in the western world short enough [...]

So today was a little eventful. It was so gorgeous and sunny that it unleashed the crazies of Freiburg. Firstly I got a shouting phonecall and then I met a man on the tram. The man on the tram (and title of my new book) shouted in a satanic voice about Hitler, his father and [...]

Tiffani and I sit down to breakfast every morning. It’s wonderful. The boys look at us like we’ve two heads; I suppose it is incomprehensible that two people that live together might want keep each other company. We discuss many things over breakfast but recently our conversation has turned to sport. We’re going to go [...]

I wrote a perfect essay for my How to Read Images class. It is “immpeccable” notes the lecturer her graded it however she also believes that I downloaded it from somewhere on the internet and did not write it myself. I had to visit her in her office hours to find out my grade (unlike [...]

Here’s a slightly pointless blog but nevertheless. No one calls my landline. Why would they I have a mobile which they text to. Things have changed.  Clair calls me now. And has done twice. Once to talk to me, the other time went like this; The phone never rings so when it does I quite [...]

Shiv came over this weekend. It was epic. The hotel where Shiv stayed is the same one Beast, Mum and TK stayed in. The owner has met my entire family now. He even asked for Theia. Shiv spoiled me rotten. She bought me shoes…shoes!  We went to the imfamous Titisee and had a picnic there. Being [...]

Daniel: “Helen! You are first girl to go and last girl to come back! But you come back looking like a super model”. The picture to your left is how little of a super model I look and how confused I was by that comment* But yes! I am back. It is ROASTING in this [...]

As some of you know Theia and I went off to Freiburg a while back now. We had great fun and pretty much ate for every hour in every day. It was the sorta holiday you only dream about and one that your waist line will never forget!  Anyway, the holiday was great but got [...]

hey everybody, what’ s up guys??? I just put some words to tell u about our trip in madrid some weeks ago. Helene, Chimo, Joan and me went to visit all the fucking madrid people. And it was, as usual, amazing, just a short moment of simple happiness. I mean i don’t have to explain [...]